I cautiously opened the door hoping that it wouldn't creak. No one had been in Mary's room since her death. It was odd to be back here in this house. It held too many memories both warm and comforting as well as painful and with a bite. Mary had gone out with a bang, just like she said she would. Silly old woman. I opened to the door all the way was was scared to death at what I saw.

Well to say I was scared to death is a lie. You see it didn't scare me to die, but it scared me to a statue. There was Mary sitting on her bed like nothing happened. "It's about time you came Anna. You're late." she told me. I didn't know what to do. I was still frozen to the spot. I hadn't blinked or moved, or closed my mouth. Bad manners I know but it fell open in shock! "Close your mouth dear and get a move on will ya? I don't have much time. I don't bite - I'm not a vampire like in that stupid book you keep reading." Yup. That was Mary alright, but she should be dead. I un-froze myself and walked to her. "You should be dead! Are you a ghost?" I whispered. Then I quickly blushed and cast my eyes down to the floor. I was being rude. "Sorry" I mumbled. Mary barked out a laugh. "No Anna. I'm not a ghost and yes I'm still very much dead. I don't have time to explain only time to tell you that I'm sorry I didn't tell you more but I didn't think my number would be pulled. When this conversation is over go to my dresser draws pull on the side paneling and you'll find a wad of cash. Take it home with you pack your things and buy a train ticked to Montana."

"Why? You're not making any sense. This has to be a joke! Ok Matt! Come out, great computer graphics" I said. She looked at me and I could tell that she wasn't laughing and was completely serious. "Anna" she barked "listen. I don't have much time. But you have to go to Montana and look for a woman named Pam Moorely - she'll tell you everything. Hurry. You don't have time. I love you. Good Luck!" And with that she faded into thin air. I briefly thought that magicians everywhere would be killing to know her secret. Then I snapped out of it, and did was she had instructed me to do. I knew her and when she said to do it, she meant it. Whoever this Pam Moorely was she better explain everything to me! With one last look around Mary's room I shut the door for the last time. I quickly excited the house, and turned around in time to see two strangers run into the house with guns drawn. I didn't hang around to see who or what they were looking for. I got the feeling that they were not nice.

Escape

The snow had just started to fall, tiny little flakes lazily drifting down from the heavens. The day was coming close to an end as I continued walking up the hill. The once bearable air got colder - stealing what little heat I had left. It was quite, like the quite where the woods' hold its breathe. I kept looking over my shoulder expecting to see something, anything and all I saw was the snow. It started to stick to the tall grass besides the path, and on the ground. The trees began to get that white frosting on it's branches. I lifted my fingers and felt the tiny snow pile upon my head. This use to bring a smile upon my lips, but it only left my feeling empty and sad. It mad my heart wrench at the thought of never being in a snowball fight again with my brother, or talking about the snow covered landscape with my mother.

Off in the distance a bird cawed. The snow began to pick up, and also became a little thicker. I could not stop and get lost in the snow's hypnotic fall, I had to keep going, mom told me not to stop and think but to just keep walking. The air was so cold that to breathe hurt. It was seeping into every pore on my body: my toes, my fingers, my nose, my ears were all starting to feel the wrath of winter. Off in the distance I heard noises. I had to keep going, I no longer had a choice.

As I walked toward the crest in the hill, the noises got louder. I could now tell that there were men, horses, and a few dogs over the rise. What were so many men and animals doing out in the middle of the woods? Then it dawned on me - it had to be an army of some sort! I had to find out, if they were good or bad. If they were our army I might be able to get some food and warm clothes - but if they were bad? . . . I dared not to think what would happen. I began to watch my ever foot step making sure that I was so quite I would not even wake a mouse. When I could finally see the camp, my fears became true for it was the invading army.

My town had been attacked two nights prior by the Halation army. My family didn't make it, my mom helped me escape the women's slave prison and I've been alone ever since. I don't know if anyone from my town made it - I pray they did. Or if they didn't, I pray that their agony was swift and that they were set free from the pain. I began my descent back down the mountain looking for a place to spend the night. I had to find a way around the army - for to be caught would be worse then death - especially for a woman like me.

********************

I've been listening to the Gladiator sound track. That is my all time favorite movie!! I wonder if you can tell?

A Dance in Honor

BAH!! I've had to listen to this song like 2395809458 times! I still can't think of anything - and again - I fear I'll be writing about death/memories. I promise you I think of other things besides that - I've been writing other things besides that!! I don't know why. I had a really rough week last week. So maybe that's influencing my writing??? Hmmmm . . . we shall see. . .

_________________________________________________________________

It's weird to think that my mother will never walk through our front door - or come watch me at my dance recitals again. I keep thinking she will, even though I know that she won't. Dad took it pretty hard - and he hasn't been the same since we got the news. He tries to pretend for "us kids" but you can tell that the smile doesn't quite touch his eyes or when you look into his eyes, you can see the pain lurking just behind - waiting to completely claim him at night. The night we found out will stay vivid in my mind.

Mom had been away at a business trip and was coming home that night. Dad ordered pizza to celebrate and we watched a movie too! It was midnight when the movie finished and Jake and I had just gotten into bed when there was a knock at the door. Dad went to go answer it and since Jake and I are inquisitive kids we snuck down and looked. We saw to cops at the door and they looked uncomfortable talking to dad. I tried to think if I had done anything wrong - I had just gotten my license and as far as I knew I'd been obeying the law. Suddenly dad started crying. We've never seen him cry - not even when he broke his foot. The cops said goodbye and dad closed the door and stared at it for some time.

He looked to the stairs and saw us standing there. He motioned us to come forward and told us. Jake instantly started crying for mom, but I couldn't. It was like everything inside me froze. I felt empty. How could mom not come home? That didn't make sense. That morning on the phone we were talking about my dance recital the following week! She was supposed to come! She has too! This can't be right - it's some mean prank that the cops or someone is playing on us. It has to be. But then why would dad by crying and not laughing?

That night was hard to sleep. I kept hearing dad crying and Jake too - but still I couldn't cry? Did that mean I didn't love her? Does that mean I'm a bad daughter? Or was I still in shock? Isn't that what psychologist would've said? I looked at my night table where a picture of mom and I at the park that summer and finally cried myself to sleep.

The week pasted so slowly and painfully. Everyone kept saying how sorry they were for us - I wish they wouldn't. I wish they'd keep their mouths shut and just stayed away. I know they're trying to be helpful - but hearing it over and over and over again - it is just too painful! When we went to the funeral late Wednesday night dad, Jake and I had to stand and shake everyone's hand. I hated that place. It was too cold and it was too sweet from all the flowers. The faces blurred and names became forgotten. People I had never meet came up to me shaking my hand saying how sorry they were for me, but I wanted to be left alone. No one had left us alone to heal. People kept calling us or visiting - afraid of how "us kids" would take it. I looked at Jake and he seemed to think the same thing I did. When everyone left we finally got to be alone with mom. We each said our goodbyes and how much we loved her. I told her of my recital on Friday and how the dance would be for her, how I loved her, and how I'd someday see her once again.

When Friday night rolled around I was nervous. One of the dance teachers pulled me aside and said someone wanted to wish me luck. She pointed the direction off stage - where parents and kids meet before the performances and thought that that was strange. My dad was going to be a little late because Jake was just finishing up his baseball game, and no one else was going to come. I walked a little further down the hallway and saw mom. I must have been hallucinating . . . right? She walked over to me and gave me a kiss and a hug and told me how happy and proud she was of me. She told me she'd always watch my performances and that she'd always be with us. Someone called my name and I turned to look - and when I turned back to face mom she wasn't there.

It was my turn to dance. When I walked on stage I looked for dad and Jake and saw them. I felt a kiss on my cheek and knew it was mom. I cued the guy and the music started. I danced in honor of mom and it was the best dance recital I've had yet.

I don't know what to call this piece so this is the title?

It's that time of week again!! INK NOTETS!! *woot woot*

So we have another wonderful pice of music that I've never heard but instantly like. I must say though that French rap doesn't sound so bad ass to me. French is a romantic language - I mean they could be rapping about drugs and like killing or something but I'd never know. I think they were talking about Charlemagne and a fight. I've taken Spanish for so many years and I heard the word pelear - which means to fight in Spanish. I also heard the word "Charlemagne" but I could've been mistake. Alrighty then to the story and away!!

***********************************************************

Growing up hadn't always been easy for Maddie. As she walked down the city street she saw a couple fighting and that shoved her back into her dark and painful past.

Instantly she was back in the dark bedroom - but this time she was watching herself at age 6. She followed her young eyes to the door which was cracked to let in the light from the hallway. Her parents shouts grew louder. She caught only a few words - but she clearly understood their meaning. Hate and Anger coated every word that her parents spoke. She cowered in that dark room. Afraid. Sad. They were fighting about her - she knew it - they hated how they had to stay together because of her. It was all her fault. She was to blame. The light seemed to mock her in the darkness. Maddie watched as her at age 6 crawled out of bed and threw open the door. Her parents froze for one second staring at her, and then picked right back up again. She threw open her arms trying to separate them.

"STOP!" she yelled. "Daddy, mommy please stop fighting!!" It was no use. These two had hated each other more than they cared for their little daughter.

Maddie resurfaced. She knew that the fights had never been about her and Ian. Her parents were unhappy people. She continued walking and passed an arguing couple. She looked down and saw their little son looking up at his parents. His eyes meet hers and for one brief second Maddie saw the horror and sorrow in his eyes. She felt his pain, but it was not her place to interject.

As Maddie continued down the street she saw how awful it truly was. Garbage, broken bottle, glass shards, empty cans littered the street. The overflowing dumpsers and added to the stench in the air. Graffiti was the prominent art in this neighborhood. She saw little kids playing tag in the street and was briefly cheered. Life couldn't be that bad could it? Surely some people grew up with a strong loving family. But before that happiness became permanent, shouts from one of the homes brought back a memory.

Her parents are fighting again. They're bickering in the kitchen over who has to pay what bill, or who should pay for new shoes for Ian, Maddie's little brother. She somehow knows that she and her younger brother have become pawns in their parents' battle. She hates herself. She is the cause of this. She is 7 now and the fights still continue. If she runs away will they be happy? Her parent's become more angered. Arms are quickly moving in anger, their voices are growing in intensity. Maddie and Ian are frozen to the spot - their pain is apparent on their faces. If only the parents would stop and look.

Maddie shakes off that memory and walks further down the road. When she reaches the end she takes a right and heads toward the park. She hears shouts of her name and quickens her pace. She sees her husband and her daughter playing tag and she smiles. Yes she thinks, there are families out there that truly love each other.

The Past

She walked into her old bedroom and looked around. It was funny, she mused. The walls were still the same shade of soft pink that made you think of pink lemonade, and the floor was still the same - but the room was not. She stood in the doorway unsure if she should walk in. It was no longer hers, all her things had been ruthlessly put in boxes or thrown out. She herself wasn't there for the packing of her things - but still they could have cared a little. Right?

She hesitantly took a step into the room. There was so much clutter everywhere and it wasn't hers. Boxes half-full, completely empty, or totally full were stacked haphazardly against the dresser. She looked to the wall that was with the door and noticed the the desk had been moved. All her pictures or posters had been torn down. She made her way across the room to the bookshelf and scanned it's contents. She noticed that her books and school work were missing. They were either packed or tossed. Tossed she thought more likely.

It hurt to be in this room. This used to be hers - and now? Now it was someone else's. The room used to be warm and inviting but now it was so cold. She laughed, cold like the new owner. She made her way to the closet and looked in. Someone else's clothes now lined the closet. She wrinkled her nose in disgust. She didn't like closets. With one last look around the room she sighed. It was such a beautiful room - now it was a disaster. They completely removed any sign that she had once lived in the room. It was a sign, they had completely removed any sign or memory of her. So this is how they wanted to be? Fine. If they didn't want to treat her things with respect then obviously they didn't want to treat her with respect. She grabbed her only box of things and left. Her heart ached as she closed the door to her old bedroom.

Untitled 3

His eyes are a rare shape of pale green - almost like jade. She feels herself begin to return the smile in his eyes. For a moment she forgets that she is on the run, and begins to unwind. An odd image of them running through a field plays in her mind. "Could this be him? Grandma did say I could find him in a old forgotten world." The door slams closed behind them making her turn. Her heart begins to beat rapidly, but when the man turns around she calms down.

"Hey, what is it? You look like you've seen a ghost!"

"Oh, I just thought I saw my ex-best friend. We're um, in a fight right now."

He didn't believe her but he left it at that. There was something odd about this girl. Her long dark brown hair was dishealved. It looked like she had run through a hurricane. The girls he had seen around most certainly not wear that particular look. She looked scared, her eyes kept darting around the room - and her body language was at competition with a wound rubber band. Overall she had a nice appearance. The dark hair was a wonderful contrast to her pale skin. His sister Haley would call her an 'ivory', whatever that meant. Her eye, were the prettiest feature to him. They weren't all together green nor were they exactly brown. It's as if those two colors had drawn a barrier and decided to both hold rank. The inner color was a dark brown - like new turned earth after it's rained. The green was like the moss that grew on the bark. It complemented her nicely. Her cheeks were a little red, and that, he supposed was because she had to have been running. There was even a sprinkling of freckles all over her face.

"I didn't get you name, and that's ok. I was just wondering if you'd like to share some hot chocolate with me. Don't let Jack scare you with the coffee facade. We have the BEST hot chocolate in all of the US!"

"Su..su...sure. I'd like that, but I can't stay long. . . I've got to...to....meet my friends."

He knew that again she was lying but there was something important about this girl. He knew he had to keep him with her - he was told that when she came into his life, that her's would be in his hands. That if she was no longer in his care she would cease to exist. He didn't know who "she" was or what the heck his Uncle had been talking about. All he knew was that something clicked with her and he had to make suer it stayed that way.

"Jack! Yo Jackie-poo! There's a change in order! Bring two hot-chocolates to my table!"

"Urh boy you know I don't like dat name. Two chocolates it'll be."

"Thanks Jack! Come, follow me madame and I shall show you ze most wonderful table in all of ze land!"

Ana felt bad for lying to him, but who could she trust? His hand was warm and soft in hers. It fit perfectly.

"You will know Anne my dear, when you have met him."

"Meet who Grandmother? I don't know what your talking about!"

"You will. When you see him, he'll be in an old world forgotten surrounded by past legends. He will have a bodyguard who blends in - but he is yours. Just as you are his. Be always with him - your life depends upon it my dear.

"Grandma! What are you talking about? Why does my life reside with a total stranger! That's so silly!"

"I can't tell you. Your mother knows, but she didn't listen. Your life will be hard now. I've tried, God knows I have. Always be prepared. You never know when you'll get a piece of paper that will change your life. . . Ana. . Ana....

"ANA!! Hello? Ya there?"

"Oh, sorry. I was just thinking."

The wonderful table Ace had been describing was set into the back of the room. They had the vantage of seeing who entered and left the cafe. Jack came with their two hot chocolates. Ana graciously accepted her and wrapped her cold fingers around the mug. She lifted the warm mug to her lips and drank down the perfectly temperatured hot chocolate. She closed her eyes and felt the warmth spread, her fingers and toes defrosted and the core of her began to climb in temperature. When she opened her eyes she saw Ace looking at her oddly. She quickly cast her eyes away and began finished her inspection of the cafe. Since they were in the back it would be easier. it was a box and they were in the back left hand side. The entrance was diagonally across them and the bar was on that side too. In fact the bar took up the whole right side. The window paralleled the back wall and had tables right up against the windows. It made it so that dinners could sip of their coffee of drink of choice and people watch. Ana relaxed when she saw that the blinds and been pulled down and titled making it harder for the people outside to see in. That's the last thing she wanted, was Mr. Man In Black to see her and catch her. The booths to the furthest wall looked so comfy! You could tell they were broken in by years of use. The little table candles had been lit and added to the old jazz feel of the cafe.

"My name is Ana by the way. Thank you for suggesting the hot chocolate, it is the best is the US!"

"No problem - you looked like you could use it."

She froze with the drink halfway to her mouth. Was he one of them?

"Wow, take it easy there. I just meant you looked cold, thats all. Listen. I didn't know how to say it or if I should, but like is there an ex-boyfriend trying to hurt you or anything?"

Her heart beat frantically. What could she say? Could she trust him? She only had meet him! But he feels different. There is something about him, and her grandmother did say she'd find him - but is he the him she was speaking of? How could she tell?

She took a deep breath and held it. She couldn't sit here forever. She slowly moved her eyes to his - and there was the answer. Yes, she could trust him.

"I. . . uh. . .it's complicated. I can't really tell you because I don't know if I can trust you, and I don't want you to think I'm crazy."

"You can trust me - I'll get you a sheet with a hundred guys all saying they can trust me. Hey, don't worry 'bout me. I've been on these streets forever - know 'em like the back of my hand."

"Ok, but I did warn you. There is a Man In Black and he's chasing me. I don't know why, all I can tell you is that they want me - and let's just say I won't be let go if they do get me."

It was her! Ace was paralyzed for a minute as he let it sink in. So his Uncle wasn't joking around! He quickly looked around and noticed that Jack was looking in their direction. Jack had known Ace's true identity all along - that Ace wasn't some street kid with no parents. Ace gave a unnoticeable nod and Jack went into the back.

"I knew it. You didn't believe me. I should not have told you. I have to leave. Thanks again."

"No! I was just thinking, he come on. Cut me some slack will ya? Gee! Don't go. Have some dinner with me I know this great food joint"

And stood there like an idiot. She knew she could trust him, but that didn't mean that she could completely let her guard down and besides she was pretty hungry. She looked at Ace, and found that he was looking at her. He wasn't looking at her like all the other guys did - with that look of shes-just-a-piece-of-ass look. His look was calculating. He caught her looking at her and averted his eyes but not before she caught the message. It was like a greeting to a fellow friend. He got up and left some money on the table.

"Come on Ana. I know where we can go that will make you double think about how good your grandmother's homemade dinner is."

With a small smile on her face Ana followed Ace out of the door and unto the semi-lit street.

Gibberish for sure

I am going to write my feeling right now. This isn't a story or a happy ending. In fact it's rather sad. I don't know why, but it keeps bothering me. I try to push it out of my mind, ignore it, but I can't. My question of "WHY!!!???!!" echos loudly in the dark.

You see I had a friend when I was a senior and she was a junior in 2005. I had heard rumors about her in school but I chose to ignore them. I would meet her and then decide if the rumors had merit (and they kind of did.) We became good friends (or what I thought) and soon became inseparable. My other 'friends' started to get annoyed with me. That was ok though, because they weren't really my friends at all. Em (name changed) and I would do tons of things together. Movie night, shopping at the mall, talking about boys, life, whatever. We went through a lot. Her family called us lesbians. I am not a lesbian and I have NO problem with gays and lesbians. I didn't understand why. I mean we were only friends and I had a boyfriend *who is now my fiance*. She was going through a rough time (or at least that's what she told me) and I was trying to be the good friend and help her. Well the thing was she betrayed me. She was dating a guy at the time who she hated and I would hear patiently has she complained about him. It was the same story over and over again. But I kept my mouth closed. Not once did I tell her secrets to the world.

But she told mine to everyone. That boy she was dating was in my circle of friends and when we began to fight she took it public. You see, I told her she was treating me like a horrible friend and that I didn't like how she would hurt me. Instead of growing up she decided to fight. I would try to talk to her to her face but she kept taking our fight on line to Myspace, or Facebook, and even Gmail. When I'd call she'd txt me back. Never could we talk in person like I wanted to. I still have the old Facebook messages.

I didn't talk to her for a year. I watched and heard what she said about me to the people I knew and was friends with first. I heard what she'd say about me and it hurt. I wouldn't say anything back. I took the lonely high road. This was someone I trusted! She was like a sister to me. I still hurt now, I didn't even do anything wrong. She later confesses that I was right all along - she was being a selfish friend. I didn't want to fight. I just wanted her to see how she was hurting me. After the year had passed I decided to amend fences. I had gotten over her past transgressions. I didn't really care anymore. So we started to talk again - and it felt like the good ol' days but this time I wasn't as naive. She lives in New York state and I live in New Hampshire state. We both went to school together in Virginia. We'd talk about how our lives had changed since we fist meet in September 2005. My fiance and I drove the 5 hrs to visit her in New York State. It was November 2008 and we were in the talks of her coming to visit us in the spring of 09.

I still remember the night before we left, my fiance and I went for a walk. Em had some house quests over (even though we were her house guests) and we wanted to give them some privacy. I told Vince that I felt like Em was holding out on me. She has never really let me in. She mention sometimes how she was having trouble with her fiance and I'd try to help out the best I could. I've always felt that she wishes for what I have. I meet Vince online in 2005 and we've been best friends ever since. As cliched as this sounds - we are soul mates. Em has wanted what I have even if she can't admit it. The months passed by and we'd call and txt every now and then. But suddenly she stopped calling me. She stopped txting me too. It was now April of 09 and I would call her and wait for the call back. It never came. As silly as this sounds - on her Myspace I was her #2 out of 100. One day when I looked I wasn't even there. So this is how she wants to end our "friendship." I called and txted even called her 'fiance' and asked what did I do wrong and could she please just call me back?! I remember saying "You don't even have to talk to me - just send me a letter or a text! Tell me what I did wrong!" But did I do something wrong? To my knowledge the only thing I find to be annoying was how much I hated work and would vent to her. But I'd make sure to ask her about her, and be genuine. She never said she had a problem when we were talking. I just don't know - and that's what bothers me the most. I could care less that she no longer likes me. I just want to know why.

And the other night (August 1, 2009) I got a text from her saying

"I hope everything is going well 4 u. Love you moogie"

What do I say to that? I txted her back asking her to call me on her free time. I just want to talk to her. I won't ask why she's done this to me. I called her today. Do you think she's returned my calls or text message? No. I stand in the dark hurt again. I'm not mad, I am just wounded and hurt. She was my friend and I forgave her - and she hurt me again. Why?

So if you are reading this - thanks I guess. Maybe you can offer me some advice? Vince and I think she was drunk when she texted me. She's become a hard core drinker something I don't wish for her. I don't know - but I do know I hurt inside. She was a friend - someone I liked talking to. And now she's done this. Thanks for reading. That's all.

The Fight (Ink Notes #3)

The lightning lashes across the sky, illuminating the world so that for one second it looks like it is day. After a few moments its friend thunder echos. The wind begins to pick up, causing the people on the street to clutch at their belongings with more determination. On the water, an elderly man looks down into the harbor. The boat begins to thrash even more as the waves become unruly. He toss a wreath of flowers upon the water's surface.

"Goodbye Jack. We still miss you" he thinks. He catches a glimpse of his face reflecting off the water and it brings him back to the day Jack lost his life. They were both sailors in Pearl Harbor. He still remembers the first 16 in. armor-piercing shell slamming into his ship, rocking everything violently. It still happens in slow motion: the explosion rocking the boat, the men getting out of bed bewildered and scrambling to put on clothes as they run to their stations. He can still see the fire raging and angry as it works to engulf everything in its path and the boys fighting to tame it. He remembers looking for his best friend Jack. He runs on to the deck holding on as another explosion rocks the ship. He sees Jack already on the anti-aircraft gun - the ship may have been injured but the men's spirits were just as strong. Hank looks around and can't help but see his friends die. He seems to be frozen, watching as the planes fly over head pelting the ship and her crew with biting bullets. The bodies jerk as the bullets fly through. The blood begins to shade the water a darker unsettling color.

He hears shouting and it helps him to gather his senses. Turning to his left he sees another friend. Mark had taken to using his M1 Gerand. It wouldn't be anything against a Japanese plane but it is all he had. He screams as he shoots getting all his anger out. Hank watches powerlessly as Mark is gunned down. Another explosion goes off in the water spraying the men as the USS Tennessee is hit. Hank looks down in the water and sees men swimming, but it's hard. There are bodies everywhere making the swim challenging. He watches in horror as the planes doing another sweep let loose their ammo and attack the men swimming to shore. It's over in a seconds but will continue to play in his mind. The bodies begin to sink down to the bottom in an ironically peaceful way.

The PT boats now begin to cruise in the water adding more support to the men. It's chaos. The fires become more unruly and begin to eat more of the ships. The black smoke billows up into the sky making it harder to see the planes. Hank goes to an empty anti-aircraft gun and begins to let loose with the bullets. He gets a plane and it explodes in the air. He gets another and another. A noise to his right makes him turn. Jack his friend has been hit! He watches frozen as Jack grabs a discarded M1 Carbine and shoots at the planes. But it is no use. The planes have an advantage. They let loose again and Jack goes down. Hank rushes over to his fallen comrade.

Jack grabs his hand. "It will be ok!" Hank thinks. His friend smiles one last time and then, like the rest of the fallen men, slip away. Hank begins to weep. How could this have happened? The smoke billowing in the air aids in his grief. He slowly rises and begins to help the other men fight. He can't stop and mourn - this isn't the place.

The thunder brings him back to the present. He wipes the tears rolling down his cheek. With one last look in the water he turns and heads back into the boat's shelter. He will never forget.

If I were an author....

CREATE YOUR DEBUT YA COVER

1 – Go to “Fake Name Generator” or click http://www.fakenamegenerator.com/

The name that appears is your author name.

2 – Go to “Random Word Generator” or click http://www.websitestyle.com/parser/randomword.shtml

The word listed under “Random Verb” is your title.

3 – Go to “FlickrCC” or click http://flickrcc.bluemountains.net/index.php

Type your title into the search box. The first photo that contains a person is your cover.

4 – Use Photoshop, Picnik, or similar to put it all together. Be sure to crop and/or zoom in.

5 – Post it to your site along with this text.

My cover was kind of hard. I had to find a way to place the name so that it wouldn't be that hard to see. But I think it works rather well :)

I got this idea from Amanda who go it from Melissa at Book Nut for the diversion!

I can't wait to see how everyone else's book covers come out!

One more picture I love

I loved how the dew was still on the blades of grass and the sunlight shined through. I wan to see if I can take more pictures like this tomorrow.

Some pictures I took....

Hey guys! So I went on an early morning walk this morning with Vince. Here are some of the pictures I took.....

You can see how the fog mixes with the sun light to create a beautiful effect.

You can see the dew still on the leaves. I couldn't resist :)

This guy was trying to cross a big road. I put him back in the grass.

Untitled 2

She couldn't remember how long she had be running. All she knew was that her shins were beginning to hurt with every painful step. Her lungs began to labor as she takes in the cold air. A car passes her and she tenses - that can't be the same town car - she thinks. Suddenly it pulls over to the side of the road, and out steps the man in black. He straigtens his coat and turns his steely, cold glare upon her. Her heart quickens and she feels her inner voice scream "RUN!" She takes off down the thin and winding dirt path. The man is hot on her heel scraming something at her but she can't stop to think what it was. The skies have darkened since she scaled down her apartment making it harder to discern certain objects. She looks around and begins to get more frantic. Every sound, from a leaf brushing the wooden bark, to a dogs call in the night makes her jump. She forces her eyes to see out into the dark. The sound of running feet behind her makes her blindly turn down the bath. The branches and bushes suddenly seem to be against her. They grab at her clothes and slow her down. The man in black calls out to her again - but she finally breaks free of the trees. Quickly checking to make sure he isn't there she runs down the street and turns the corner.

She begins to slow her pace and comb her hair with her fingers. "Just calm down, ok Anna? He didn't see you! It was so dark...riiight. I need to find a place that's not to crowded or too isolate." She looks down the street and sees THE SUPREME BEAN. It used to be one of the most suburb coffee hot spots in its time - you weren't somebody until you preformed there. Anna timidly walks to the door and takes one quick look before entering. The rain had stopped falling giving the area a nice clean scent. The street was shrouded in the dark save for THE SUPREME BEAN and another across the street. It looked as if she was alone. She walked into the coffee joint and noticed the nostalgic decor. The dark forest green had faded to a muted dingy green. The smoke that lingered in the air, even after the patrons had left, added to the old legacy. On the wall, faded black and white pictures of old legends smiled back to the customers. Ana only recognized a few faces. Her mother used to listen to this music. She remembers her mother dressed up in a lovely rich red Valentino dress. The fabric looked so soft, like the inner most part of a rose. The edges of the dress twinkled in the light, and made it look like little faeries dancing. Ana begins to smile to herself as she watches her mother twirl over to her father. "Darling to night will be so magical! I can't wait to see the other women's faces!" She doesn't remember what her father replies she only knows that it makes her mother laugh again.

"Can I help ya wit sometin?" She looks to were the sound comes from and notices a burly man at the register.

"Yes, do you have any orange juice?"

"Ya do know this is a coffee joint?"

Ana begins to blush in embarrassment. Every restaurant she had been to had seemed to have o.j., why would this place be any different?

"Oh, um yes. In that case may I have a small black coffee?"

The man nods his head and walks towards the back to get her order.

"Don't mind Jack. He gets a little grumpy when he thinks you'll waste his time being indecisive. Say, you don't look familiar. My name is Ace. What's yours?"

Could she trust him? Her grandmother had said that when you began the run you could not trust anyone - everyone would be your enemy. Ace didn't look like any bad guy. He had pretty hair, the light bounced off of it nicely. It was a nice dark brown with subtle hints of a lighter brown. The curls played along his forehead giving him a boyish look even though he was probably her age. When she looked into her eyes something eased inside her.

Untitled

She sat quietly at the window watching the rain splash against the glass. It had been a long, tiring day. She couldn't seem to shake the events of the afternoon. She looked down at her fisted hand, and noticed that she still held the note. Slowly she uncurled her fist and re-opened it.

She is gone. Run before they find you.

Anna didn't know what that meant. She hadn't talked to her mother in years. The last time she talked to her mother was when she was twelve. All her mother had said was "Sorry sweetie. It's better this way." She remembers feeling sad and angry. How could her mother leave her? She looks around the small room. Her old lumpy bed sits against the corner with her favorite quilt. On her bedside table the lamp is currently on, and her favorite book The Life is opened to the dog-eared page. A car passing by catches her attention and brings it back outside.

She looks down a see a man in a black trench coat get out. He looks up at her from the street and a chill runs down her spine. "Odd" she thinks "why should he be wearing sun glasses on such a rainy evening?" The man walks to her building door and enters. She gets up and walks to her tiny closet. A memory of her old life rises lazily to the top. Her old closet used to be much bigger than this one. In fact her old closet was a walk-in, stuffed to the brim with designer clothes. Oh, and the shoes! Any girl Anna's age would've loved to have had her collection. She doesn't have time though to walk down memory lane. Already she is running behind, so she quickly grabs her bag and turns off the light. Silently she walks across the living room to the front door.

She presses her ear to the door straining to hear any noise. She cracks the door and slowly leans her head through the door frame. The elevator chimes and the doors slowly open. Out walks the man who Anna saw on the street. The man looks at her and quickens his pace. Anna quickly closes the door and locks it. She was warned this might happen. She looks around the living room looking for something to push against the door. She finds the sofa - it has to do. She quickly runs to her bedroom and throws open the window. Looking down at the street below she sees that it's relatively quite. She grabs the rope ladder that has been hidden under her bed and throws it over the windowsill following it down. As her feet touch the ground she looks back up at the window and sees the man in black leaning out. She turns and then quickly runs down the street knowing she'll never see her old home again.

Nature's Stain Glass Window

I took this picture 2 months ago. It's one of my favorites - it makes me think of a stain glass window ( I also took the one on the blog title)

Let go

Step out of the box I tell myself.

Let go of those fears that hold you back.

Why do you let them win?

Take a chance. Be brave.

You only have one chance - so take it.

Standing on the edge looking down

The world is small.

And breath taking.

Jump into life - I tell myself.

Just one small step - take it.

I take the chance and jump.

Do I regret it?

No.

I am living life

As it is meant to be lived.

Free of

Fear and

Regret.

Life is mine again.

Today nothing can hold me back.

Not envy

Not greed

Not hate

Not fear.

Life is beautiful once more.

Life is mine again.

Guess the Poem

I would like you to guess what I mean - or what you think I mean. Can you guess the emotion? What are your thoughts?

Hello?

Is anybody there?

No reply.

It's cold

And your alone.

The dark creeps forward

Ready to take

All the light from you.

But suddenly

Appears a man.

He sits next to you

And the darkness parts.

Warmth returns

And so does the light.

Small at first

But it grows fast.

Soon the world has

Color again along with warmth.

You are happy once again.

Guess the Poem

I wrote this poem, and when you finish reading it I would like to know what your thoughts are.

The searing hot pain,

The black and never ending pit.

You want to scream.

And destroy.

And inflict paint to others.

You hurt too.

It grabs your heart and wont let go.

Hurting.

Reminding you - making you hate.

But who is there to listen?

Who is there to care?

It makes you lose your mind, that

Black, soul engulfing mist.

How to control it? How do you not go

Insane? How do you not to hurt?

You wonder.

But the feeling is still there - just as

Hot and powerful.

For now - a little under control

Waiting.

The Smile

I wrote this for the Ink Note challenge on Amanda's blog. The song was Damien Rice - I remember.

The sun sets as she walks home. It was a perfect day; not a cloud in sight. The day went by so fast she can only recall that finally she got to see him and how happy she is . As she walks past the place they had their first kiss she looks down to her wrist where the bracelet lays. She grabs the little heart being held by the chain. On the heart are their initials : V + M

A small smile begins on her face. "Yes" she thinks "today was a good day".

The day had began as they normally do - with the big fire ball in the sky rising and pushing darkness back. As she slowly opens her eyes it hits her that today she finally gets to see him. Before today they days had crept along so slowly, like they knew she was waiting for today. It had been months since she last saw him. She looks at the clock - it's 9 am. He won't arrive for another 3 hours. Hmm what to do till then?

She gets out of bed still tired and walks to the bathroom. She looks at herself in the mirror and thinks "Ugh. shower. makeup. Yes that should do." She's nervous about their meet. She still wonders if he'll think she's pretty? Will he still like me?

Finally the time arrives. A knock on the door. Could that be him? She nervously checks herself in the mirror and slowly walks to the door. Her thoughts and fears swirl around her mind. She pushes them aside. Nothing will ruin this moment. She opens it and, it's him. He still looks as handsome as ever. His dark curly hair is more unruly than ever, he has a slight 5 o'clock shadow, but there are those kissable lips, and when she looks in his eyes she sees it. He still loves her. They smile.

He grabs her - hugs her so tightly and whispers "finally" into her ear. They run to the car and hop in. They begin to drive with the wind whipping at their hair and urging them to go faster. The town become a blur as she drives faster and faster, and then the sea coast is there. She finds a parking spot and they jump out of the car. They race each other to the water. The waves are crashing into the beach - it looks like they are excited for them.

He grabs her hand and they walk. They are in their own world - nothing can interrupt, nothing can invade, their world. They begin to run on the beach. As they run the sand is kicked up and as it falls back down it stings. The wind whips their hair into a frenzy and stings their eyes. Faster and faster they run. They push themselves to run faster still. Their lungs begin to scream for more oxygen, their heart begs for them to stop so it can catch up but still they run. Finally the rocks come into view. The rocks create a barrier for the beach and sea. They run to the rocks and begin to climb. Then they reach the spot where everything comes together: air, water, land. He looks into her eyes and says "finally".

Ink Note

Amanda over at Ramblings of a hopeful artist has come up with this fun idea! Each month or bi-weekly she'll post a new song. Listen to it without looking at the video and write what comes to mind. Anyone can join!

a quick note

As many of you may know, my other blog is solely about books. For awhile now I have been wishing to have a place where I could right - and be judged on that writing. Who would want to be judged on their writing, you ask? Me. It will help and I get to learn what you think. My writing will be poetry (what I think that means) and short stories. I have secretly wanted to publish my own book now (who hasn't?) for as long as I can remember. Maybe I'll post some of the story and see what the feed back is. I hope you enjoy my 'writings'. I can't wait to learn what you think of them :)